MAYOR'S KID KIDNAPPED
RICE INFORMS PRESIDENT BUSH OF NEW LEADER OF CHINA
DOZENS SPOT UFO IN REPUBLIC
POLKA BAND DENIES BEING 'KINGS OF POLKA'
AREA MAN EXPERT ON WHAT WOMEN HATE
OUR NATION'S CRUMBLING INFRASTRUCTURE
DIS COUNTRY DON'T NEED NO PRESIDENT
TRIVIA
WE NEED YOUR BEST COOKING STORIES. YOU CAN BE 'IMMORTALIZED'

TOP STORY!
Mayor's Son Kidnapped!

Orsham J. Wuntis II, son of Orsham Wuntis,
Mayor of Winona, was nabbed outside of
Da Yoopers Academy for the Truly Privileged
Private School

Condoleeza Rice
Informs President Bush Of New
Leader Of China

Recently discovered footage of Condoleeza Rice informing President Bush on the new leader of China.

Our Nation's Crumbling Infrastructure:
What We Need To Do!

The decrepit state of our nation’s infrastructure is a ticking bomb..

Dozens Spot UFO in Republic!

“I want everyone to forget this whole
thing ever happened, because it didn’t
happen," stated a Military official from
Scott Air Force Base during an
outdoor conference in Republic.

Links To Other Previous Exciting News Stories Located Above-Left!
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